Autonomy Fantasies

part one: on consent

i.

I ain't no candle in the wind / I'm the board, the lightning, the thunder

— Lana Del Rey, “Mariner’s Apartment Complex”

I used to rent a three-bedroom apartment in East Hollywood. I was young (twenty-one), rich (just passed a six-figure income), and well-acquainted with my desires (being young and rich). Once the child bartering with psych-ward nurses o…